Wednesday, 3 September 2014

You Couldn't make it up

Many people look forward to their holidays away to rest by the pool/beach and enter into some light reading while they sunbathe.  Sunbathing isn’t really my thing, but reading most certainly is and I was away on holiday, I had more time to absorb myself in the daily newspapers and books that were in my ‘to read’ pile.  Most people have a ‘to do’ list.  I purchase books and have a ‘to read’ list which is never exhausted.
News stories and articles about Domestic Violence always catch my attention, and in a matter of days the several different papers I read, carried several stories.   Bizarrely, there seemed to be the publication of several studies which made claims of how Domestic Violence could either be caused or prevented all reaching the printed media at the same time. 

The most sensible was The Times 26th August 2014

“Constantly telling a partner that she is fat may be a symptom of domestic abuse, according to a Labour frontbencher.
Seema Malhotra, appointed yesterday to the newly created post of shadow minister for preventing violence against women and girls, said that trying to erode someone’s self-esteem could be part of a broader pattern of behaviour.”

Although this report is written in the gender-specific fashion that I abhor, later in the article an acknowledgement that men are victims too.

“She highlighted figures showing that 12 million woman and 2.5 million men had been the victims of domestic abuse.”

I would question those statistics, but at least the plight of men wasn’t ignored completely.

However, the day before that report appeared the same august publication ran this story:

“Couples who smoke cannabis are less likely to engage in domestic violence, US research suggests.

Married couples who both use cannabis at least twice a month reported the least perpetration of violence. If only the husband used cannabis, this reduced the likelihood of the wife being violent.”

Ah, so that explains why my ex-wife was abusive to me, I didn’t smoke cannabis.  In fact, I’ve never smoke cannabis.  Maybe I should have done if this ‘reduced the likelihood of the wife being violent.’

However my favourite report also appeared on the 28th August , but in one of our tabloid newspapers, The Sun:

“A Solicitor was under fire yesterday for claiming kebabs could cut domestic violence.  Janet Hood, 57, spoke at a licensing hearing to get a takeaway’s opening hours extended.  She said in Dundee eating would make drunks too tired to attack.  Ms Hood added: “Medical evidence suggests eating after drinking helps induce sleep, which could help lower alcohol-related domestic violence.”

Now if you know me, you will know that I love and enjoy eating kebabs.  And, unlike the majority of the population, I enjoy these when I’m sober and I certainly don’t fall asleep after consumption.  However, it set me thinking about my past.

Both my ex-wife and myself never drank alcohol as part of our religious observance.  So her violence towards me wasn’t alcohol-induced.  She also seldom ate kebabs preferring to order fish when I visited the local takeaway.  For me, it was kebabs as the healthy option (well, you do get a portion of salad with them).  

I can’t comment on the effects of Cannabis, but Kebabs didn’t cut out the violence I experienced.  In fact, I probably ate more kebabs because I was a victim of Domestic Violence
.  I didn’t drink alcohol or smoke, so comfort eating kebabs was my escape from the suffering I endured.

You can call me fat because I have eaten too many kebabs.  Maybe I should have smoked cannabis instead but that would have had other implications for me I’m sure (It would also have been contravening the religious views I held at that time) .

Smoking Cannabis or eating kebabs will never cut domestic violence.  You couldn’t make it up, but someone obviously did!!!

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