I got more reaction from my last blog than any other. I was told it was offensive. I was accused of making Domestic Violence gender-specific when it isn’t. I was called sexist and a narcissist. All my attackers were female.
I found the charge of making Domestic Violence gender-specific quite ironic because regular readers will know that I find all violence abhorrent and I often state that there is never any excuse for any form of abuse, irrespective of gender. What I do campaign about and highlight through this blog (and my own personal story) is the inequality and the gender-bias way in which Domestic abuse is viewed by society. The way in which it is reported suggests that men are always the aggressors and women the victims. The truth, however, is different and that is what I try to show. Men and Women can be Domestic Violence perpetrators and both genders can also be victims. It is not a Gender issue, but was made one by the women’s movement (who continue to perpetuate this myth) and too many people are either too miss-informed or afraid to challenge this misperception.
Blogging is about sharing your story and opinion. Our opinions are often influenced by our own personal experiences. If you choose to read my blog, I thank you sincerely. You may agree with what I write. You might disagree and have a different opinion. You also have complete freedom to express whatever opinion you hold. I respect that and dialogue is always good in sharing different viewpoints. Where I draw the line is when it becomes personal. No-body has the right to insult another person. I may not agree, but I can accept another’s opinion. What is unacceptable is personal attacks because someone has a different view or opinion. Hang on a minute, isn’t that how all conflicts and wars begin?
So what caused such controversy? I happened to post about a local young woman who made AND admitted to making false domestic violence allegations against her male ex-partner. Such a story couldn’t be refuted as it was there in black and white. What caused such offence was my comment that the leniency shown by the Judge wouldn’t have been the same had the wrongdoer been male. How could I suggest such a thing?
Making like for like comparisons in case is never easy, but several different stories appeared on my news feed today.
· 2 young women launch an unprovoked attack on a 77 year old blind male bus passenger.
Punishment: 2 months suspender prison sentence
· Female social worker admits falsely accusing Father of Child Abuse
· Judges are ‘ordered’ to be more lenient when sentencing female criminals
So I caused offence when suggesting that women are possible of making false accusations and yet another example in reported. My comments about judgement leniency caused outrage and yet, it is reported, judges have been instructed to make such rulings.
Trying to find a like for like case, the closest I could find was a 78 year old Asian lady attacked by a 31 year old male.
The 31-year-old was arrested on suspicion of racially aggravated criminal damage, racially aggravated common assault and racially aggravated intentional harassment. I couldn’t find the outcome of sentencing, but if this man was found guilty I doubt he would have been given a paltry two months suspender prison sentence. He would have had the book thrown at him and rightly so. And just to re-address the balance, I can’t find any examples of men being arrested after making false domestic violence allegations.
All abuse and violence is wrong. Those found guilty of such crimes should be punished equally. Part of the punishment for incarcerated men is separation from family especially their children. They are told that they should have thought about the impact on their children before they committed whatever the offence may have been. Surely, the same incentive should be used in trying to deter women from committing crime too? Instead, because they do have children they hope for leniency and a lighter sentence. If you do the crime, you should be prepared to do the time.