I got more reaction from my last blog than any other. I was told it was offensive. I was accused of making Domestic Violence gender-specific
when it isn’t. I was called sexist and a
narcissist. All my attackers were
female.
I found the charge of making Domestic Violence
gender-specific quite ironic because regular readers will know that I find all
violence abhorrent and I often state that there is never any excuse for any
form of abuse, irrespective of gender.
What I do campaign about and highlight through this blog (and my own
personal story) is the inequality and
the gender-bias way in which Domestic abuse is viewed by society. The way in which it is reported suggests that
men are always the aggressors and women the victims. The truth, however, is different and that is
what I try to show. Men and Women can be
Domestic Violence perpetrators and both genders can also be victims. It is not a Gender issue, but was made one by
the women’s movement (who continue to perpetuate this myth) and too many people
are either too miss-informed or afraid to challenge this misperception.
Blogging is about sharing your story and opinion. Our opinions are often influenced by our own
personal experiences. If you choose to
read my blog, I thank you sincerely. You
may agree with what I write. You might
disagree and have a different opinion.
You also have complete freedom to express whatever opinion you hold. I
respect that and dialogue is always good in sharing different viewpoints. Where I draw the line is when it becomes
personal. No-body has the right to
insult another person. I may not agree,
but I can accept another’s opinion. What
is unacceptable is personal attacks because someone has a different view or
opinion. Hang on a minute, isn’t that
how all conflicts and wars begin?
So what caused such controversy? I happened to post about a local young woman
who made AND admitted to making false domestic violence allegations against her
male ex-partner. Such a story couldn’t
be refuted as it was there in black and white.
What caused such offence was my comment that the leniency shown by the
Judge wouldn’t have been the same had the wrongdoer been male. How could I suggest such a thing?
Making like for like comparisons in case is never easy, but several
different stories appeared on my news feed today.
·
2 young women launch an unprovoked attack on a
77 year old blind male bus passenger.
Punishment:
2 months suspender prison sentence
·
Female social worker admits falsely accusing
Father of Child Abuse
·
Judges are ‘ordered’ to be more lenient when sentencing
female criminals
So
I caused offence when suggesting that women are possible of making false accusations and yet
another example in reported. My comments
about judgement leniency caused outrage and yet, it is reported, judges have
been instructed to make such rulings.
Trying
to find a like for like case, the
closest I could find was a 78 year old Asian lady attacked by a 31 year old
male.
The
31-year-old was arrested on suspicion of racially aggravated criminal damage,
racially aggravated common assault and racially aggravated intentional
harassment. I couldn’t find the
outcome of sentencing, but if this man was found guilty I doubt he would have
been given a paltry two months suspender prison sentence. He would have had the book thrown at him and
rightly so. And just to re-address the balance, I can’t find any examples of
men being arrested after making false domestic violence allegations.
All
abuse and violence is wrong. Those found
guilty of such crimes should be punished equally. Part of the punishment for incarcerated men is
separation from family especially their children. They are told that they should have thought
about the impact on their children before they committed whatever the offence
may have been. Surely, the same
incentive should be used in trying to deter women from committing crime
too? Instead, because they do have
children they hope for leniency and a lighter sentence. If you do the crime, you should be prepared
to do the time.
Your blog is an inspiration, I was domestically abused by my wife for many years, she eventually ran off with our son in Feb this year, I have not seem my son since. I tried reaching out to every authority, but was ignored. The police told me I had no complaint, even though I had days worth of my wifes abuse recorded on a dictaphone I carried in my pocket.
ReplyDeleteEventually went the family court route, my wife did not show for the first two sessions, finally appeared at the third and accused me of Domestic Violence, being a drunk and drug addict (which I am not) and mentally unstable.
Court have ordered Psych review, drug and alcohol tests all at my expense, and still no access to my son. And I cannot present my evidence to court until November!
Because she has made this accusation, the court are unable to do anything till I can prove her wrong!
Thank you once again for a balanced article.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you; women should not receive lighter sentences simply because they are female. The criminal justice system isn't perfect, even mandatory sentences have not changed this. As to domestic violence perpetrators being mainly men, no, you're right there too, but not according to the statistics, since many male victims never report the crime to police.
ReplyDelete