Summoned

I drove over to another property managed by the charity where this more senior manager was based.  It was approaching five o’clock on Friday evening, the time that all managers finished for the weekend.  Workers carried on working outside of office hours with an ‘on-call’ manager available on the telephone but only in the case of emergencies.

I repeated all that I had told my immediate line manager.  I was then asked to hand over my security pass and keys and informed that I was being placed on ‘gardening leave until further notice.’   Other workers were told that I’d gone home ill.   I guess they instantly thought that this was suspicious because I was known for never taking any time off work through sickness.  The senior manager arranged to come and see me at my home the following Monday to ascertain more details about my situation.

As arranged, the manager came out to see me. Once again, I told of all the events surrounding my caution.  She commented that I’d “not told her anything new and repeated what I’d said the previous week.”   I thought to myself, ‘There’s nothing more to add. I’ve told you everything about the offence I committed.’   I also spoke about the state of mind I’d been in after 18 years of being abused.  For a man to admit to anyone that he has been a victim of domestic abuse is not an easy step to take.  Some have been sympathetic, others quite dismissive.  I’m not making any excuses, what I ended up doing was wrong and I have taken responsibility for that and paid a very big price.

What did happen was completely out of character for me and I have subsequently described it as an unconscious cry for help.  I do know that had I not been worn down by Sandra’s consistent abusive behaviour, I would never have committed the offence I did.

A few days after the manager’s visit, I received a letter summoning me to my work base for a probation review.  As I was still on my initial 6 months probation period with the charity, the letter stated that my probation review was being brought forward to ascertain whether I’d met all the work criteria set for me.  It also stated that an unsatisfactory review could result in my contract being terminated.

I attended the review.  It was over within fifteen minutes.  I am convinced that the outcome had been pre-determined.  There had been no problems or concerns over my job performance.  As far as I was concerned, there had been no concerns over my conduct.  I had been honest with the organisation.  However, management took a different view and rated my conduct as unsatisfactory because I’d not informed them earlier of my trouble with the Police.  Within twenty-four hours of receiving the caution, the organisation knew about it.  They felt I should have disclosed events earlier and so terminated my contract.  I was informed of my rights which included requesting an appeal review.

I left totally devastated.  This job had meant everything to me.  I felt that I had been treated very harshly and unfairly.  So much for understanding stigma around taboo subjects which was one of the charity’s values!   After receiving my notice, I was at the lowest point mentally and emotionally that I had ever experienced.

Lone Working

I was offered two jobs, although both were not full time contracts.  Both were working with Charities involved in the care sector.  One was agency work and I was told that there were plenty of shifts available with opportunity of a full time contract.  The other was a supplementary job working on a zero hour basis.  Both roles involved an element of lone working.

As a church minister, lone working was nothing new to me.  However, being trained to keep and stay safe while lone working was a new concept.  The church had a lone working policy that applied to employees, but ministers did not fall under that category.  No church legally considers their ministers as employees.  Such any minister take any sort of action against the church as their employer, the case is always thrown out of court.  Currently, no courtroom will overturn the church’s stance that the minister’s contract is with God, not the church as the minister entered into a spiritual covenant rather than an employment contract.

Many Church ministers get called upon to enter dangerous situations with very few people knowing where they are.  No risk assessments are ever carried out concerning the well-being and safety of a minister.  In recent years several vicars have been murdered by people they were trying to help.  Around 12% of all clergy have suffered some form of harassment or suffering.  I’d never even thought about my own safety as a church minister.  I’d entered squats and other dangerous places alone.  I’d had to deal with people who were very clearly disturbed unaware whether they posed a risk.    Putting your trust in God alone sometimes isn’t enough.

I only realised the importance of feeling safe when lone working when instructed by the two charities that employed me.  Both gave me alarms and instructions to follow your gut instinct.  Both had policies that mean that all work spaces including clients homes were risked assessed.   One charity also gave me a works mobile phone and every appointment was clearly logged.  If there were any last minute changes, I had to notify the control office immediate.  There were also certain times of the day where I had to make contact.  Failure to respond could mean that my own personal safety plan was put into operation. Knowing that the organisation was looking out for my welfare certainly helped my own sense of well-being.  I felt I was working for an organisation that actually valued me as a person. 

Job Hunting

It had been over twenty five years since I last looked for an alternative job.  Preparing my CV took several days.  What skills do I enter on it?  Would seventeen years as a church minister mean anything to prospective employers?  Technology had changed the search.  An abundance of websites all making claims that they had the right job for you.  I’d not really had to look for work before; it seemed to find me so this was a completely new experience.  I’d actually started my first job before I officially left school, working on days that I was suppose to be studying for my O levels and just taking off the days when I sat my examinations.  I can’t even recall being interviewed for this job.  It was a typical school leaver’s role that my Father had arranged for me.   I just turned up one day and started as a junior office boy.  It suited a purpose but offered no long term prospect.  After twelve months I began looking for employment with better career prospects.  Someone who attended the same church as me, knew I was looking and so recommended me to his management.  His company interviewed me and offered me a new job.  I knew that I didn’t really sell myself well at interview. It was only because my new company preferred taking on people that came recommended by valued staff that I embarked on a new career.  I did change jobs after this but stayed in the same industry.  Again, I didn’t really look for work but was headhunted by people who knew my reputation or had previously managed me.

When I felt it was time to leave this industry and enter church ministry, there was a different selection process.  Not everyone who expresses an interest in church ministry gets chosen. Someone wanting to become a church minister first had to be an active member of their own church.  The church elders then had to give their backing and vouch for the suitability of the applicant.  The applicant would then be interviewed by the Diocese before attending an appraisal weekend which would determine whether or not the applicant would be invited to complete a residential course at the Ministers Training College. 

It took me a while to break down all that I did as a Church minister and write it in a style that would be understood.  Most job adverts stated that if you hadn’t heard back from them within a certain timescale then on that occasion your application was unsuccessful. It can be soul destroying sending off application after application and not receiving any feedback back.  Just the slightest news would offer a snippet of encouragement.  With so many people job hunting, prospective employers probably haven’t the recruitment budget to respond to everyone. 

There were also unscrupulous people seeking to take advantaged of the unemployed.  One scam I came across was that I received an email stating that on this occasion my application was unsuccessful, but the agency could train me up so that I had the necessary qualification.  Even better news was that they would pay me for the days I studied.    All I had to do was email them my bank details!  Strangely enough, the only way to find them on the internet was via a link that they sent to you.  No internet search would direct you to the same site.  It sickened me that these vultures were preying on people desperate for work and robbing those who failed to recognise yet another internet scam.

 I just wanted to work so applied for all roles I thought that I could.  Within a month I had been offered several interviews with different care providers.